Mud-club

Chat & Social => The Bar - General Chat => Topic started by: Bush Tucker Man on October 16, 2006, 14:03:54

Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Bush Tucker Man on October 16, 2006, 14:03:54: It's Joannes (SWMBO) birthday today.

So I got 'Small-Child' up this morning & let her have a bit of a lie-in (till 07:15), got into trouble for letting her over-sleep

Took 'Small-Child' to school, got into trouble for forgetting her PE kit-bag

Went to B&Q for something, called back at Sainsburys for one of those Thorntons chocolate/toffee cakes for after tea.
Doubtless I'll get into trouble & get the usual;
"Don't You Know I'm On A Diet!!"

Like I said, you just can't win

I also got into trouble for telling her I wanted absolutely nothing for my birthday next week :roll:
(unless she's bought me a Griffith, or a 101FC :wink: )
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Horness on October 16, 2006, 14:28:10: Don't worry BTM - you can never please 'em. :wink: They're all the same.

I spend so much time in the dog house I've redecorated it and had satellite TV fitted. :lol:

[RANT]
I'm in it again actually. It turns out that it's my fault that an event on Sunday that was due to start at 1400, did not start until 1445. I had no involvement in the planning, or the schedule of events (one of the teams was stuck in traffic with road works it turns out) - but hey, I get more grief than the organisers did! :shock:
[/RANT]

When we do good things - we're after something (or did not do it good enough), when we make mistakes, they will never be forgotten. Ever.
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: V8MoneyPit on October 16, 2006, 15:57:52: And the list goes on......

This week we have had Sarah's long time friend staying with us. Happens to be a tad attractive (not that that has any bearing on this, you understand :lol: ) I am getting accused of paying more attention to her than Sarah...... ME???? Well, actually it's probably true :oops: :oops:

So maybe sometimes the gripes are founded!

But you are right. Bought flowers the other week. For no reason. Don't do it often. Just decided it would be a good idea. "What do you want?" was the reception .... excuse me? do have to want something? :shock:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Sooty on October 16, 2006, 16:06:35: This is a transcript of a conversation between a man and his partner upon returning from work after working hard for 12 hours to pay the bills etc.

Man:- Hi honey I'm home.
Woman:- YES I CAN SEE THAT!!!!
Man:- Everything ok dear.
Woman:- FINE!!!!
Man:- WhatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s the problem?
Woman:- NOTHING!!!
Man:- There is clearly something wrong.
Woman:- WELL IF YOU DON'T KNOW THAN THERE IS NO POINT IN TELLING YOU.
Man:- With the greatest of respect my darling if I don't know then there is every point in telling me.
Woman:- THATS JUST TYPICAL OF YOU, NOT A CLUE HAVE YOU?
Man:- No
Woman:- WELL I AM NOT GOING TO TELL YOU, IT DOSEN'T MATTER ANY WAY!!!
Man:- Ok, whatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s for tea.
Woman:- TYPICAL, ALL YOU EVER THINK ABOUT IS YOUR BELLY.
Man:- Ok my love I will go and get a takeaway.
Woman:- IS MY FOOD NOT GOOD ENOUGH THEN
Man:- Your food is lovely, we can eat when you are ready.
Woman:- JUST LIKE YOU, PROMISE TO TAKE ME OUT FOR A MEAL AND THEN WHEN I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO IT YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND.
Man:- I give up.
At this point the man starts to walk into the other room to see if he can get some kind of clue why this all started
Woman:- THAT IT JUST WALK AWAY, YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME DO YOU.
This can go on for hours and you will never get to find out what started it so why bother going home after work just go down the pub and then when you get home you will know what the problem is "you have been down the pub" but you just won't give a monkeys and you can then fall into your chair and start snoring.
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: V8MoneyPit on October 16, 2006, 16:08:07: :(biglaugh): :(biglaugh):
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Stormin on October 16, 2006, 19:15:26: Ahhh! Married bliss :? I remember it well. :roll:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: bezzabsa on October 16, 2006, 19:17:46: Quote from: "Sooty"
This is a transcript of a conversation between a man and his partner upon returning from work after working hard for 12 hours to pay the bills etc.

Man:- Hi honey I'm home.
Woman:- YES I CAN SEE THAT!!!!
Man:- Everything ok dear.
Woman:- FINE!!!!
Man:- WhatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s the problem?
Woman:- NOTHING!!!
Man:- There is clearly something wrong.
Woman:- WELL IF YOU DON'T KNOW THAN THERE IS NO POINT IN TELLING YOU.
Man:- With the greatest of respect my darling if I don't know then there is every point in telling me.
Woman:- THATS JUST TYPICAL OF YOU, NOT A CLUE HAVE YOU?
Man:- No
Woman:- WELL I AM NOT GOING TO TELL YOU, IT DOSEN'T MATTER ANY WAY!!!
Man:- Ok, whatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s for tea.
Woman:- TYPICAL, ALL YOU EVER THINK ABOUT IS YOUR BELLY.
Man:- Ok my love I will go and get a takeaway.
Woman:- IS MY FOOD NOT GOOD ENOUGH THEN
Man:- Your food is lovely, we can eat when you are ready.
Woman:- JUST LIKE YOU, PROMISE TO TAKE ME OUT FOR A MEAL AND THEN WHEN I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO IT YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND.
Man:- I give up.
At this point the man starts to walk into the other room to see if he can get some kind of clue why this all started
Woman:- THAT IT JUST WALK AWAY, YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME DO YOU.
This can go on for hours and you will never get to find out what started it so why bother going home after work just go down the pub and then when you get home you will know what the problem is "you have been down the pub" but you just won't give a monkeys and you can then fall into your chair and start snoring.

and remember its WORSE with PMT!!!!!!!
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Bush Tucker Man on October 16, 2006, 20:11:30: Quote from: "V8MoneyPit"
But you are right. Bought flowers the other week. For no reason. Don't do it often. Just decided it would be a good idea. "What do you want?" was the reception .... excuse me? do have to want something? :shock:

You're also forgetting the 'What Have You Done?' question :roll:

Quote from: "bezzabsa"
and remember its WORSE with PMT!!!!!!!
Run & hide in the garage, and close the door :(scared):
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Manicminer on October 16, 2006, 20:14:35: I have learnt the art of deafness on command and to keep my mouth shut.
It's worked well for a number of years now :wink:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: the loon on October 16, 2006, 20:30:29: Quote from: "bezzabsa"
and remember its WORSE with PMT!!!!!!!

did you hear abiout the man who died from PMT :?:

his wife shot him for bringing home the wrong colour flowers
:lol:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Guardian. on October 16, 2006, 21:11:40: im glad our workshops are on our farm, i spend a lot of time in there!
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Horness on October 16, 2006, 21:50:35: Quote from: "Sooty"
This is a transcript of a conversation between a man and his partner upon returning from work after working hard for 12 hours to pay the bills etc.
...
...

:shock: How long have you had my house bugged?

:lol:

PMT - 14 days of tension. 7 days of hell. 7 days waiting for the dust to settle.

Q: What's the difference between BSE and PMT?
A: One is Mad Cow Disease; the other was a big problem for farmers!
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: dreadnought110 on October 17, 2006, 07:20:04: Quote from: "Horness"
Quote from: "Sooty"
This is a transcript of a conversation between a man and his partner upon returning from work after working hard for 12 hours to pay the bills etc.
...
...

:shock: How long have you had my house bugged?

:lol:

PMT - 14 days of tension. 7 days of hell. 7 days waiting for the dust to settle.

Q: What's the difference between BSE and PMT?
A: One is Mad Cow Disease; the other was a big problem for farmers!
How many wife's read this and are now plotting REVENGE?? I am afraid!! :oops: :oops:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: the loon on October 17, 2006, 10:07:26: Quote from: "dreadnought110"
How many wife's read this and are now plotting REVENGE?? I am afraid!! :oops: :oops:

:lol:
I would be if I where you too
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: discowoman on October 17, 2006, 10:49:14: Quote from: "bezzabsa"
and remember its WORSE with PMT!!!!!!!

and you live with me bezza :twisted: :twisted:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: the loon on October 17, 2006, 14:58:47: Quote from: "mrsbezza"
Quote from: "bezzabsa"
and remember its WORSE with PMT!!!!!!!

and you live with me bezza :twisted: :twisted:

well its been nice knowing you bezza

:lol:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: crazymac on October 17, 2006, 15:29:06: Why do they call it PMT :?:

Cos Mad Cow Disease was already taken :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :lol: :lol: :lol: :wink:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: MuddyMike on October 17, 2006, 15:57:22: Q. Why does it take three women with PMT to change one lightbulb?

A. IT JUST DOES OK, DON'T ASK BLOODY STUPID QUESTIONS. IF I WAITED FOR THE MAN OF THE HOUSE TO CHANGE THE BULB I WOULD BE SITTING IN DARKNESS FOR DAYS. THEN WHEN HE DID CHANGE IT HE WOULD LEAVE THE OLD BULB JUST LYING AROUND FO ME TO TREAD ON. And on. And on.

Mike
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Sooty on October 17, 2006, 21:04:44: Quote from: "MuddyMike"
Q. Why does it take three women with PMT to change one lightbulb?

A. IT JUST DOES OK, DON'T ASK BLOODY STUPID QUESTIONS. IF I WAITED FOR THE MAN OF THE HOUSE TO CHANGE THE BULB I WOULD BE SITTING IN DARKNESS FOR DAYS. THEN WHEN HE DID CHANGE IT HE WOULD LEAVE THE OLD BULB JUST LYING AROUND FO ME TO TREAD ON. And on. And on.

Mike

And then reminded of it about 2 years later for no earthly reason.
Why has nobody ever written a book called "how to understand a woman"???
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: Bishops Finger on October 17, 2006, 21:50:37: Q Whats the difference between a rabid pit bull and a woman with PMT
A You can reason with the pitbull..... :lol:
Title: You Just Can't Win!
Post by: the loon on October 17, 2006, 21:59:44: Quote from: "Sooty"

And then reminded of it about 2 years later for no earthly reason.
Why has nobody ever written a book called "how to understand a woman"???

it would be out of date the moment the next fad diet or the next change in fasion etc etc came along

:lol: