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sartorial elegance
Biodiesel-Bev:
--- Quote from: "Lord Shagg-Pyle" ---
--- Quote from: "biodiesel-queen" ---
--- Quote from: "Lord Shagg-Pyle" ---
--- Quote from: "biodiesel-queen" ---
--- Quote from: "Lord Shagg-Pyle" ---
--- Quote from: "biodiesel-queen" ---Lucky Lady! It probably has something to do with the hand positioning, you know, so she doesn't fall of your knee! :wink:
However, I'm sure her Ladyship wouldn't be very impressed to hear you're comparing her to a stuffed and plastic doll with a deranged grin and scarey eyes. You'll be getting a good thrashing with the birch. :smack:
--- End quote ---
I don't use my hands. :wink: Mind you, she did get the star roll in that wonderful love story, 'Bride of Chucky'
--- End quote ---
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Never a dull moment in your house, particularly at midnight on a dark and stormy night. :(vamp): :(bloodshot):
--- End quote ---
Very true but I just wish Mother in Law would keep quiet. I don't know what else to do. I've soundproofed the cupboard under the stairs, I feed her a bucket of fish heads each week, but she still moans! Such is life.
Back to the garage for me. I have things to create.
--- End quote ---
I have the same problem with my cellar. No matter how many rugs I put over the cellar trapdoor, I can still hear the kids shouting to get out.
What are you creating in the garage? Have you been raiding the local cemetary again for body parts to make your own Bride of Frankenstein? I've been busy powering the electric fence to the national grid - oh what fun it is to watch people leaning over into the field to stroke the horses and getting zapped!
--- End quote ---
Nothing as exciting as that I'm afraid. As a way of de-stressing I build model aircraft and that is where I have been banished to, due to the smell. Not from me, althought after ale,..... no I'll leave it there.
Her Ladyship doesn't like the smell of glue, paint and varnish in the house, where as I quite like. It's not as addictive as most drugs, but whenever I glue stuff, my special friends come to visit, like Dave the one eyed green dog and Steve the purple dragon.
Horses eh? Wretched things! Eating all my money, and crapping everywhere! 'Ates 'em, I doz, 'ates 'em!
She complains about my glue and then brings home horse blankets smelling of horse poop and wee, and leaves them in the house to dry! :evil:
Put them all in tins!
--- End quote ---
Hmmmm, I used to have the same thing for marker pens when I was at school, I'd be asked by the Latin master to write the verb "I love, you love, he loves etc" on the flip chart, but would go off in a trance as soon as I removed the lid of the black marker pen. Soon came crashing back down to earth when I felt an exercise book slap me on the cheek, but would end up with a comedy moustache from the pen as the book swiped my hand and said pen across my upper lip! :lol: :oops: :lol:
You want to stand further away from the horses if they're getting so close as to eat your money from your wallet. :wink:
Lord Shagg-Pyle:
Ruddy things! Why can't they be interested in something less costly, like slugs or hamsters?
Biodiesel-Bev:
--- Quote from: "Lord Shagg-Pyle" ---Ruddy things! Why can't they be interested in something less costly, like slugs or hamsters?
--- End quote ---
Have you ever tried to do sitting trot on a slug? Or tried to jump a hamster over a clear round? NO??? Then don't ever question why we women love our horses! Not if you value your crown jewels!!! :evil: :wink:
Lord Shagg-Pyle:
Horses are Evil! I'm not the only one that thinks so either!
When I was little, I saw horses on tv and thought, 'wow! they look interesting! I'd like a horse!'. What they don't show you on tv is the pure hatred horses have for humans. I can't really blame them, as humans have ridden around on them, jammed spurs into their sides and beaten them with whips... but I never did that to them so they should leave me alone. Even those small horses that look harmless still have a burning hatred for humans.
Campaign Of Death
The horses are smart, as in they make the deaths appear to be 'accidents'. Here is a list of some things they are doing ON PURPOSE!
they throw people from them (Christopher Reeves)
they bite people (my cousin got bit)
they stampede and trample people to death
they phone me late at night and neigh messages of death at me
they pretend they are walking away, but instead deliever a kick of death to the human standing foolishly behind them
they invade dreams (DC once dreamt of being bit on the hand!)
they pretend they are going to jump over something but instead stop, causing the human to be flung over them and onto the ground where they can then stomp on them
they send me letters with threatening hoof prints on them
Warning signs of an impending attack:
If you're hanging around horses (I don't know why you would), then here are the warning signs to look out for.
snorting
stamping of the foot
flicking of the tail
trotting
neighing
threatening letters or phone calls
How do we stop this?
Short term: If you think there is an impending attack (which there will be at some point) then I suggest hiding from the horses.
Long term: We clear out a huge section of a country and give it to the horses so they may roam in peace. There is no other way without more violence and killings, which would suck.
Anyone who doesn't agree with this is one or more of the following:
a horse
a horse dressed up like a human
in denial
under the influence of a horse or horses
wants to be a horse
Horses - they'd give you the finger if they didn't have hooves
Biodiesel-Bev:
--- Quote from: "Lord Shagg-Pyle" ---Horses are Evil! I'm not the only one that thinks so either!
When I was little, I saw horses on tv and thought, 'wow! they look interesting! I'd like a horse!'. What they don't show you on tv is the pure hatred horses have for humans. I can't really blame them, as humans have ridden around on them, jammed spurs into their sides and beaten them with whips... but I never did that to them so they should leave me alone. Even those small horses that look harmless still have a burning hatred for humans.
Campaign Of Death
The horses are smart, as in they make the deaths appear to be 'accidents'. Here is a list of some things they are doing ON PURPOSE!
they throw people from them (Christopher Reeves)
they bite people (my cousin got bit)
they stampede and trample people to death
they phone me late at night and neigh messages of death at me
they pretend they are walking away, but instead deliever a kick of death to the human standing foolishly behind them
they invade dreams (DC once dreamt of being bit on the hand!)
they pretend they are going to jump over something but instead stop, causing the human to be flung over them and onto the ground where they can then stomp on them
they send me letters with threatening hoof prints on them
Warning signs of an impending attack:
If you're hanging around horses (I don't know why you would), then here are the warning signs to look out for.
snorting
stamping of the foot
flicking of the tail
trotting
neighing
threatening letters or phone calls
How do we stop this?
Short term: If you think there is an impending attack (which there will be at some point) then I suggest hiding from the horses.
Long term: We clear out a huge section of a country and give it to the horses so they may roam in peace. There is no other way without more violence and killings, which would suck.
Anyone who doesn't agree with this is one or more of the following:
a horse
a horse dressed up like a human
in denial
under the influence of a horse or horses
wants to be a horse
Horses - they'd give you the finger if they didn't have hooves
--- End quote ---
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Hmmm.... I'm hazarding a wild guess here but, I think you dont like horses!?!
I've grown up with and had horses all my life - my parents used to have a riding school and livery yard until I was 14, I used to have numerous ponies and horses and used to go all over the country show jumping. I used to spend nearly all my waking hours with horses. However, I do have to agree with you on several of the points, as i have suffered many of the incidents on the 'campaign of death' -
- Been thrown from horses
- Been trampled by said horses
- Been bitten by horses (on a very tender part of my chest)
- Been thrown when horse pretended he was going to jump the fence but changed its mind. I went over the jump, horse didn't.
- Broken by arm, ribs, finger and two bones in my neck, and also have a permentant hoof shape scar on my leg due to falling off and horse standing on my calf.
You'd think it would be enough to put me off, but fool that I am I still have horses.
Haven't had the threatening phone calls or letters though. You must have REALLY P***ed a horse off!
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