Chat & Social > The Bar - General Chat
Lights !
TDi90:
--- Quote from: "BadgersRover" ---But our resident chav vehicle driver (M19ROO) has piped in yet :wink:
--- End quote ---
LOL yes where is he?
Evilgoat:
--- Quote from: "TD90" ---
--- Quote from: "BadgersRover" ---But our resident chav vehicle driver (M19ROO) has piped in yet :wink:
--- End quote ---
LOL yes where is he?
--- End quote ---
Possibly scared :)
Ja1983:
LMAO!
quality read!
Durhami had a middle aged woman whilst on the mobile in a ford Ka last week, wouldnt let me in when lanes merged.. SWMBO started getting very erratic when she noticed that the wing mirror of the ford Ka was actually IN my wheel arch!
luckily the twerp behind her who hadnt let me in before seemed to change his mind...
spent the next 20mins in traffic sat on (and possibly a few times touching) her bumper with main beam on...... think she may have seen me then!
pulled into the next lane at the traffic lights next to her and gave her sufficient verbal abuse to ensure she wont make the same mistake this week.... fingers crossed
SUPERMARKETS
particularly at this time of year have to be the bowels of hell.... a double space, on bay in front of the other... scumbag in corsa with more exhaust pipes than a bangkok crack house cuts right infornt of me and dives into the first bay, overhanging the second by about 2 ft.. he stops the engine and starts rolling a cig.... with window wound down, i give the usually greeting to such folk, "yer dads in armley and your mums on the dole... you F`kin stiff!!" then drove round the block.....
been in the pickup, the rear of the bed is about 3ft off the ground, and has probbly 3ft of overhang... when i got to the otheside of the double space, it was still available..
without much hesitation, i reversed in at probably a tad on the exciting side of the recomended 10mph limit until the truck ws fully in the bay.
as i exited HOBO, i heard a sharp crunch into reverse and spotty asre corrected his parking alignment! magic!
also irritating is the c**ts trick of flicking your main beam back on just before you pass the car on the opposite side of the road.. theres a repeat offending mondeo who may shortly befall the pointy end of "blinded pickup driver" (following fitment of winchmount of course)
for a bit of fun how much damage do you think the mondeo will have?
a) a weekend with the T-cut?
b) a weekend in pinderfields?
c) a convertable?
d) new bonnet vent?
e) FUBAR (F***ed beyond All Recognition)?
f) everything above diff level attached to pickup?
g) Brown interior
h) bent arial and tyremarks?
:lol: :lol:
please also find below Billy Connolys 13 irritations: (while on topic ;) )
MAURE LANGUAGE, its billy Connely afterall..
Billy Connolly's 13 things I hate about people:
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I know
where my watch is pal, where the f*ck is yours? Do I point at my crotch
when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire
room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change
the channel manually.
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too".
F*cking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it
is. Why the f*ck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people
do this? Who and where are they?
5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No
tosser, I paid 10 quid to come to the cinema and stare at the f*cking
floor.
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?. Didn't really give me a
choice there, did you sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new,
then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement,
then there must have been something before it.
8. When people say "life is short". What the f*ck?? Life is the longest
damn thing anyone ever f*cking does!! What can you do that's longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come
yet?. If the bus came would I be standing here, Knob head?
10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'. So
what did they used to be? ears, Wellington boots?
11. When you're eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?' No
it's really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate.
12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an
image I really didn't need.
13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you if you don't
insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering..... It has to be a
McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger gets blank looks. Well I'll have
a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you f*cking McTosser.
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